The Madness of Brazil - Tchau for now
21.11.2006
32 °C

Ola Amigos
Firstly let me say how disappointed I was to watch Monday night football this morning from my Santiago Apartment and find most of the players and the crowd wearing gloves, it looks mighty cold back on the island. A little different to the toasty Chile where it’s been around 30c and clear skies for the last week.
Anyway enough gloating on the weather there is plenty of sun, fun and frolics to fill you in on following our last entry. Firstly we did indeed leave Rio to head North to Salvador. Upon arrival we met Sophia early in the morning and headed to their squat aka Casa de Clownage. Sophia’s boyfriend is a full on professional clown so staying with them in their squat for a few days whilst looking for a permanent place to stay was somewhat interesting although unfortunately Amoroso was really sick whilst we were there, so on the 3rd night we headed out into big bad Salvador to seek a inn for night. As it were reet late at night Sophia had done a scouting mission and come up trumps with a cosy little place just round the corner. Champion. So with an overnight bag we walked round to the hotel, which despite its neon frontage didn’t look too bad. We gets inside and Sophia is giving the 2 girls on reception the chat in the local lingo and Uge starts a pondering where exactly we were about to stay. Firstly the 2 young ladies on reception (well a desk at most) were somewhat young and scantily dressed. Maybe that’s just receptions round here we thought then we were showed to our room “The deluxe couples suite” Sounded nice, eh, so we opens the door to the room and there slap bang in the face the penny drops. The room had 2 showers, Mirrors everywhere, a circular bed with plastic sheets and a TV (which was off but you guessed it had plenty of franky Vaughn for the couples to enjoy) It all fell into place why the 2 girls were giggling when handing over the keys they thought that Gavin, Sophia and Menisha were all sleeping in the deluxe couple suite making sweet music. Ahem. 2 guesses anyone?? Yes it officially a MOTEL not a hotel which put into English terms means knocking shop. Nice. So in absence of anywhere else to stay we put our own sheets down and tried to kip without thinking too much of last nights customers and the many stories the plastic apple sheets could tell us. To see just how bad it was we have a number of pictures (nothing rude you perverts) of this quality establishment. Next morning we checked out and went to find more suitable digs for the next couple of weeks with Sophia leading the search using her contacts and local lingo skills. Basically no one would offer the gringos a bed so it was another night at Casa de Clown on the floor. Next day we did manage to find a gaff just round the corner through a guy from the local bar who spoke English. It was a clean room in a hotel round the corner from Sophie and it was dirt cheap (roughly 50 quid for us both for 2 weeks) and the people seemed nice so we went for it. First few days in the place were reasonably quiet we befriended a neighbour who seemed nice and helped us out with a few things, but this lady later turned out to be a living nightmare. We stupidly gave her about 1.20 to buy some soup on a national holiday when the banks were closed then for our remaining days in Salvador banged on our door at all our o ask for some more money. Turns out this lady is completely doo-lally and smokes crack. Top Banana. On enquiry with the local barman he concedes that he forget to mention that most of the neighbours had drug problems mainly smoking, and that he largely supplies the whole building with very strong cheap weed. Yes ladies and gentlemen you can begin to see a pattern emerging here, everybody in Salvador is mad and either drinks like a fish or is on gear. Other examples of madness included the barman who had a wife and kid but most of his questions were related to do English women put out. Normal really for Brazilian men I suppose but this directness was the first we had seen. Other bonkers events include being taken to the centre drunk-dens of Salvador to talk to raving loony’s. I eventually named this 12 monkeys bar as everyone there even by 10.30 was usually pished when we walked past. One time when I stopped by there were 6 drunks guy 2 of them talking to themselves the others slurring at each owner just sitting in the middle of it all with his head in his hands. We met a guy in the main square who tried to sell us crack before meeting his young son for his birthday and I saw a guy in town who was walking a 5 RS note again about 1.20 in English pounds. He had it on a lead kept talking to it and even stroked it when he stopped at the lights, and the final straw for me was seeing a guy on the floor being lifted into an ambulance outside a bar on a Sunday afternoon. Ambulance showed up wrapped him in plastic, chucked him in the van left and the old boys went back to their beers. Turned out the geezer was dead when chucked in the ambulance but the locals just kept on drinking and the barman didn’t even close the bar. Business as usual I guess. Now I know England has its nut jobs but this Salvador is truly the world beater. Salvador is very African in both its appearance and atmosphere and locals certainly live for today and don’t worry about tomorrow probably because of the hangovers. Despite the madness we did enjoy Salvador it was hot, cheap and good to see a different side to Brazil and to meet local people and pick up some more language. Eventually though the madness did become too much especially the raging crackwhore with crazy eyes so we upped sticks and got the hell out of dodge. Our original plan was to go further north and see some of the cost but we changed our schedule and flew back down to civilisation in Rio where we had such a great time during our 1st visit.
Rio was as ever fun we spent most of the time chilling at our hostel which was minus the Salvador madness and met some nice American folk from NY and some English lads from Leeds who were top boys. Despite the rain in Rio we did manage to get out on a Saturday to Lapa with lads from Leeds and other hostel crew which was truly top notch. Several strong cairparinhas later we ended up in a Samba club in this amazing space jam-packed full of locals. It’s a bit like a school disco in that lads and lasses stand round the edges waiting for each other to ask any chance for a dance treacle? So after me and Menisha had freaked out the locals with some all action Geordie robotic, tech electric Samba moves (lots of strange looks) I tried to give the Leeds lads an example to follow by asking a Brazilian girl to dance. The offer was accepted but within 2 minutes of seeing my samba skills I was unfortunately sin binned. Taking my courageous lead the lads from Leeds took the plunge only to be told to F-off by a lovely lady. Amazing what English is taught in Brazilian schools these days.
From Rio we flew into Santiago Chile to stay with Martin and his family. Martin works for the British council in Computars and has a cushdy number here in Chile which we are taking full advantage of (we have been here a week already). Martin has a top flat a relatively posh part of Santiago complete with girlfriend, dog and swimming pool on the roof. Nice. As the weather has been scorchio since we arrived the pool has been our favourite plus point so far, only downside is having to put up with Martins company. Our days have pretty much consisted of waking up around midday and either watching cable, taking the dog for a walk and sitting on the roof. Santiago is nice, less hectic than Brazil and better food. It feels more European than South American only with better weather. We did have intentions to explore the surrounding area but largely we have been too lazy or too comfortable too do anything other than worship the T.V or the sun. We did manage to haul our asses up on Saturday morning to go on the Wine train tour. Yep folks it does what it says on the tin you sit on a train tasting wine and getting pished, I think we clocked our first glass at around 10.30. The tour was fun despite being overpriced and the fact that we have had better and cheaper wine from the local shops. One definite plus point to Chile is the Wine and the fact that you can get a decent bottle for about 1.50 English pounds, needless to say a bottle a day keeps the doctor at bay or something like that. So our recovery from the madness of brazil is over and we are due to leave Santaiago this afternoon to go down south to the Chilean Lake District where we plan to get a whole lot more active. Activities on the agenda include volcano climbing, white water rafting, fishing, bathing in springs and of course more wine drinking which is a sport in itself.
More pictures are now up on Flickr (not all completely sorted yet) including Pantanal, Rio, Salvador and Chile. Highlights include the Jerry Springer and Elvis shots and also lots of camp photos of me in a swimming pool. Enjoy
http://www.flickr.com/photos/29762003@N00/sets/72157594384841362/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/29762003@N00/sets/72157594384824939/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/29762003@N00/sets/72157594384812308/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/29762003@N00/sets/72157594384783875/
Laters Cold People
Gav and Menisha
Posted by G_Huge 08:11 Archived in Chile Tagged luxury_travel Comments (0)
